Lately, thats how God has chosen to talk to me. I mean, i can't complain, right?
The last two weeks have been a real struggle and it still continues to be, mentally, and physically. I'm sleep deprived and only a little over worked. But i would take weeks like this for the rest of my life, because i'm sleep deprived for Jesus. As i look at these kids i'm working with this week at Kids College, i see Him. When they laugh i see his joy, when they sing i see his spirit, and when they hug me, i see his grace. He is so alive here and i'm so glad he has answered my prayers for finding ministry here, in Michigan.
As i drove home tonight i watched the sky change colors, they were perfect yellows and oranges, my heart swelled with joy to know i serve the one who painted that. I heard him whisper the story of Peter when he walks on water. When i got home i turned to the book of Matthew and dug deep.
"Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”
-Matthew 14:29-31
I almost started crying. This story was me, this week. Jesus has called me to follow him onto the lake, to only focus on Him, but when i start to worry about memorizing my lines for Kids college, or how tired i am, or how much i dont want to go to my job because it interferes with fellowship, i start to sink. I then cry out to Him, "Lord, Save me!" And immediately i feel his hand reach down and grab me. "Why do you doubt me?" He asks. I am weak, and i let the wind carry me away from my one true focus, but not tonight. I am putting blinders on my eyes so that i may only focus on Jesus, this wind will not drown me. I have a king that lets me walk on water with him, i will not sink.
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