My heart breaks.

Sex Trafficking hits home with me, for whatever reason.  My heart just aches for these girls, and some boys that are forced into that.  Take some time and go to these sights and support an organization that is doing something about it.  I just ordered a t-shirt, now i'm praying.  Thats all i can do at the moment, but i'm asking God to make it enough.

http://love146.org/

http://freethebirds.bigcartel.com/

You paint these colors into me.

Sunsets. 
Lately, thats how God has chosen to talk to me.  I mean, i can't complain, right? 
The last two weeks have been a real struggle and it still continues to be, mentally, and physically.  I'm sleep deprived and only a little over worked.  But i would take weeks like this for the rest of my life, because i'm sleep deprived for Jesus.  As i look at these kids i'm working with this week at Kids College, i see Him.  When they laugh i see his joy, when they sing i see his spirit, and when they hug me, i see his grace.  He is so alive here and i'm so glad he has answered my prayers for finding ministry here, in Michigan.  
As i drove home tonight i watched the sky change colors, they were perfect yellows and oranges, my heart swelled with joy to know i serve the one who painted that.  I heard him whisper the story of Peter when he walks on water.  When i got home i turned to the book of Matthew and dug deep. 

"Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus.  But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”

-Matthew 14:29-31

I almost started crying.  This story was me, this week.  Jesus has called me to follow him onto the lake, to only focus on Him, but when i start to worry about memorizing my lines for Kids college, or how tired i am, or how much i dont want to go to my job because it interferes with fellowship, i start to sink.  I then cry out to Him, "Lord, Save me!" And immediately i feel his hand reach down and grab me.  "Why do you doubt me?" He asks.  I am weak, and i let the wind carry me away from my one true focus, but not tonight.  I am putting blinders on my eyes so that i may only focus on Jesus, this wind will not drown me.  I have a king that lets me walk on water with him, i will not sink.   

"let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching." 

-Hebrews 10:22-25

Shooting stars.

The other night i was blessed to be able to spend time with my favorite boys in the whole world at my friend Samuel's camp.  We laid on the porch of their cabin with pillows and blankets and watched the sky as shooting stars passed by.  There is nothing that can compare to a starry night at camp.  We laid and talked about Jesus and sang a couple of worship songs and i think there was a sing along to "here comes the sun" in there as well.  It was refreshing to just be, to just sit and be amazed at how awesome our God is.  He placed each star in it's place just like he has placed us in the places we are.  When i get to just enjoy Him, i feel so much closer.  Lately, i've been going, going, going, its hard to take a breath and breathe Him in.  Constantly breathing him in is something i've been working on, even when i'm busy.  Nothing is more important than how my heart is with God.    I'm constantly amazed by his grace and how he showers me with it.  I can only smile and try my best to make him happy.  I, myself am so weak and frail but he takes me and tells me i'm useful, and he can do great things with me if i remain in Him.  I'm blown away by that, i'm blown away that the creator of the whole universe would want to use me in his plans.  In my mind it doesnt make sense but i just nod and kneel at my fathers feet until he tells me to go, hopefully i obey, or at least stay out of his way so i dont mess it up (which i do more often than not.)

Our God is good, he is incredible, he is just, he is loving, and he is AWESOME.
I'm so stinking lucky to serve Him, i delight in his presence.